Wednesday 16 May 2012

Saturday 12 May 2012

my love after Allah

dear mama,
i love you and i'm so sorry. there's no word can even describe how sorry i am. i am truly sorry mother :'(

Sunday 8 April 2012

counting the days

Ya Allah kau kuatkanla semangat aku. Aku yakin semua yang berlaku ada hikmahnya.sesungguhnya kalau ini jalan buatku kau permudahkanla dan aku sudah berusaha dan melakukan ape yang termampu.Ak redha.kau jauhkanlah ak dari segala kesedihan.aminn

Wednesday 29 February 2012

=(


me not happy.May Allah helps me through this tough and difficult time. am trying my best and i don't want to disappoint my mom and dad.they're one of the reasons why i still 'tabah' in a way to be a doctor.

anak soleh by Rabbani



Thursday 15 December 2011

feeling hopeless

today is friday and apparently i've just woke up from sleep, feeling empty, think nothing but there is huge dissappointment in me.well yesterday night i locked myself in my room, kept on thinking about what had happened during short cases and eventually i cried myself to sleep. haven't done that for a long time.and now i decide to listen to coldplay's song which always help me in these hard times.i know it's just exam and dah buat pon and you have to let it go tp xbole berterusan mcm ni.mcm mana pro nnt???short case ade 4 and what if i couldn't answer all???i know i have to be redha to all this.i know that.Ya Allah kuatkanlah semangat aku.i put all my efforts in my studies.berjaya dlm study is my happiness because it's my parents' happiness.i'm hopeless in other areas in life including love, memasak etc.ni jelar ak tau buat study utk lps jd dr.so this is my only happiness.i don't wanna give up and still trying hard here. Ya Allah please give me strength.bye for now

sorry viewers, i'm feeling down at the moment

Tuesday 6 December 2011

teluk intan

salam semua,
lama gilerrr rasa xupdate blog ni kan.rasa malas+tatau nk cite ape+bz dgn studies (kononnye) adalah antara sebabnye.kali ni punye entry khas didatangkan dr teluk intan.this is my 2nd visit to teluk intan.my last visit was 2 years back in 2009 when i was in year 3 doing rural & urban posting.mase tu mmg heaven gile rase mcm bukan amek medic pulak time tu.bersuka2 pastu happy sane sini.pastu asek melepet je gan bdk2 posting.pegi menara condongla (jakon gile),g mcD (time tu takde wifi lagi tp skg dh ade kire byk kemajuanla), g pangkor and every night ade je plan nk pegi mane padahal takdela byk sgt tmpt melepak cm kl.well, for this time around posting x same pon gan bdk2 rmh so xdela melepet sgt plus posting paediatric kot.takkanla nk melepak2 sgt.byk btolla kemajuan kt teluk intan skg.not so rural anymore.kitorg was posted to paediatric ward at teluk intan hospital and i kinda love this hospital.kes dia xdela sehebat mcm selayang tu but i love the environment here.people are wayyyy nicer and very warm.i love teluk intan people =P.sejak posted sini rasa best pulak masuk ward and doing physical examination kt org lagipun nk end of postng exam.so kene mantapkan skill.risaula pulakkn byk tatau lepastu mcm dh bc pon byk lupe2.ya Allah semoga dipermudahkanla perjalanan hidup hambamu ni sebagai medical student.neway, sambung balik.sebenarnye rindu juga rmh tapi xdela rasa homesick mcm zaman2 dlu bile kene hantar kt sbpi sabak bernam tu.campus medic uitm kt teluk intan pon best.internet tip top (sumber kelalaian), good facilities, great location (just next to the hospital) and cantik jugak campus.membantu utk lebih fkus belajar becuz next week exam.nervous jugak ni.common cases i found here are bronchopneumonia, acute gastroenteritis, pertussis,dengue,asthma, thalassemia. not so common cases pulak mcm cerebral palsy with meningocele, demyelinating encephalomyelitis myelopathy (kalau nk tau go google yourself cuz kes2 neuro ni ak slow sikit). oklah.sampai sini saje.sekian
ps:masa buat entry ni ak siap dh tertdo pastu bgn blk sambung tls lg.hahaha.

Monday 31 October 2011

emosi

salam semua..
berdsrkn tjk diatas, mst anda2 bole agak dh ape yg ak nk citekn.mmg boring pn tp buat2 bace jerla dan kpd sp2 yg rajin nk baca, ak nk cerita sikit ak org yg mcm mana dalam realiti kehidupan ni.kpd besties2, dorg mmg paham dan taula ak org yg mcm mn


ak ni org yg bole dikatakn happy-go-lucky.xsuka nk sedih2 or marah2.tp cpt jugak naik angin dan cepat jugak sejuknye.tp x bermaksud ak seorg yg sensitif sbb ak selalu xamek serius kalau bdk2 ni kutuk2 ke gurau kasar dan sebagainya.tp itu yg org nampak di luaran


dalaman yg org tak tahu, ak ni cpt down and cpt rs discourage dan seterusnya ak menangis sendirian.dan bile i'm having these hard times, org lain xkan tau kecuali mama.tp mama selalunya bknlah pendgr yg baik(i dun blame her though.dia lg happy-go-lucky.tamola dia terheret skali dgn kesedehan ak ni) but atleast ak lega sbb ak dpt smpkan ape yg terbuku di hati.selain itu,ak bersyukur sbb Allah selalu bantu ak sbb walau betapa kecewa pn ak, ak xpernah give up.ak cuba bangun dan kuatkan usaha.ak tau sume ujian yg Allah bagi ade hikmahnya dan Allah sayang kite dan tamo kite lupekan Dia.mmg btolla bila org ckp bila kte ssh br cr Allah dan br nk ingat Dia.ak masih berusaha utk menjadi hamba Allah yg lbh baik.InsyaAllah.even rakan2 jarang tau bile ak bersedey sume.dan kdg2 bile ak jz ckp kat msg 'sedeyla', mksd dlm realitinya 'Aku sangat sedih dan menangis dan ak harap ko bagi semangat kat ak supaya ak tabah menghadapi sume ujian  ni'


kadang2 org tgk ak macam seorg yg tiada masalah and life happy je manakala diorang la paling stress sbb byk assignmentla, kene presentla, kene buat reportla blabla.ak pon lagi byk kejela tp xperlu nk bgtau or cerita kat semua org.ak every 7 weeks ade end of posting exam dimana exam ak tu scr verbally dpn 2 lecturers yg bole nk tanya ape2 saje.ape2 case je bole dpt.kadang2 syndrome pelik2 dimana sepjg posting xprnh jmp tibe2 ade dalam exam tu.report jgn ckpla.within  7 weeks tu kne send 2 case reports and make sure u know those patients well.presentation??jgn ckpla.at least dlm setiap posting (dlm 7 wks tu) ade 2-4 presentation utk seminar or case presentation dimana selalu diattack oleh lecturer jgk.itu belom msk bedside teaching presentation yg at least sorg kena present 3-4x.kalo nk markah byk or nk perform better presentla banyak2. tu belom msk part2 sah2 kena maki,bebel,sindir dgn lecturer sbb tatau jwb.nnt jd HO lg terok.and talk about cuti.ssh gile nk dpt cuti kot.so there you go!bkn korg saja stress dlm dunia ni!!dan bkn ak saja yg stress jgk dlm dunia ni.kena redhala jalan yg dipilih dan setiap jalan tu adelah ujiannye.

ak ni jugak bkn seorg yg open up to people unless i really know you well.i don't simply cerita problem2 ak kt org,cite kerisauan ak kt org,i'm just not.and kdg2 ak jgk xphm kenapa org bole menjd supersensitif.mmgla karakter dia mcm tu.tp masalahnye kadang2 ko nk ckp lps and kenekan org lain bole but then bile org ckp sikit psl ko dh sakit hati.ak mmg tapaham.this is life.you've gotta deal with little2 things.kdg2 kite lupela byk org jauh lg menderita dr mende2 kecik2 cmtu.just move on your life!


dan satu benda org WAJIB tau pasal ak adelah ak paling benci org yg cancel mende last minute( except cancel clsla).SGT BENCI dan sgt pangkah org mcm ni.dr experience ak sendiri, mmg bile org buat cani, ak mmg naik angin gile2.ak ni sgt realistik orgnye.ko bole je cancel bende kalo ko ckp awl2 at least 1 day before.tp kalo haritu jugak ko cancel or 30min be4 tu jgk ko cancel....aishhh,jgn cr psl.don't mess around with me when it comes to this kinda thing.tahap skt hati ak ni bole smp berbln2 smp ak xmo ckp pn gan ko.mmg tahap xmo kawanla.that's the kinda person i am.i'm very lenient tp certain things yg ak xsuke mmg ak sgt xsuke.dan br2 ni br sj berlaku dan skrg ak sgt pangkah itu budak.


oke.sekian sj utk hrni.wasalam